Wednesday, July 30, 2008

VBS craziness

First day of VBS, my conversation with little 5 year old Andrew.
Andrew hid his arm under the tablecloth.
Me:  Andrew, where is your arm?
Andrew:  Up in heaven with Jesus.
Me:  That is a great answer.  When is it coming back?
Andrew:  Right....NOW!  (he pulls his out from under the tablecloth)

Second day of VBS, during closing, the earthquake hit.  Figures.  I about forgot that I was the one in charge who had to calm everyone down and make sure everyone was okay.  It was quite the shock.

Third day of VBS, talking with the 4 and 5 year olds.
Juan Miguel:  Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. My mom and dad live at the geiko store.
Me:  Do you live with them?
Juan Miguel:  No.
Me:  Where do you live?
Juan Miguel:  In my own apartment with my brother.  I cook and clean.  Then I walk and drive to the geiko store.

Oh.  The afternoon after I posted my last blog, the girls and I decided to drive down to San Diego to see Barcelona play again.  You know, we had nothing better to do.  :)  They were surprised to see us.  We had another great night.  Brian gave me his party hat and Rhett gave Ashlee some rockin' sunglasses.  We met also Matt, from This World Fair.  He is crashing at our place for a couple days.  He cracks me up and has made things at our place interesting.  I think us girls are going to see him play at the Knitting Factory on Friday.  It should be fun.

This has really been the craziest week.  :)

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Hollywood Night

I am warning you, this is a LONG post, but I had a great time last night and didn't want to forget a single part of it.

Yesterday afternoon Jenny, Jessie and I took the train to Union Station where we met Ashlee waiting outside to drive us over to West Hollywood.  After a short drive we were cruising down Sunset, pointing out sketchy motels and exquisite shopping.  A parking spot was found near the Viper Room where we would later be spending our evening.  We arrived hours ahead of time because it made the most sense when thinking about travel time and traffic.  

After we parked we all exchanged our flats for heels and began search for food.  As we were walking by the Viper Room we ran into Chris, Brian and Rhett unloading their van for the show.  After hugs and introductions we left the guys to unload and we kept on in our search for a so-called “Sexy Mexican restaurant.”  Little did I know that wasn’t the actual name of it, rather it was called Isla and it was another block away.  We were some of the only customers in there for a while, but it was a fun atmosphere, decent food and crazy conversation.  There is where we decided our new catch phrase is “like a rocket on Monday.”  Don’t ask how we came up with it or the context in which we were talking because none of us can remember.  

After our meal and each of us checking out the cool bathroom we continued our walk down Sunset.  There were so many restaurant and cool shops, as well as so many guys in cars staring, one with his mouth open, or honking as we made our way down the street.  Maybe I should be a little more self confident, but mostly it felt awkward.  After more walking, eyeing beautiful clothes in store and sore feet we found a Peet’s Coffee back near the Viper Room.  We bought freddos, not frappucinos and talked and laughed about life.  Peet’s closed at 8:00 and kicked us out.  So with nothing really to do until the Viper Room doors opened at 8:30 we went and were the first ones in line.  Dorky? Yes, but so worth it.  

While we were sitting/standing by the back door a super sleek and hot black car parallel parked in front of us.  A very cute, red headed woman stepped out of the car.  We all noticed how adorable she was and then noticed how much she looked like Amy Adams…no, that she was Amy Adams.  For those of you who don’t know, she is the woman who played Giselle in Enchanted and Katy on the Office and Susan in Talladega Nights.  She looks around at the parking meters and searches for coins while the four of us debate whether we should talk to her or ask her for a picture or do nothing at all.  We decide that since she is obviously trying to have a normal night on the town maybe a picture would not be the best, but we really couldn’t not say something.  So as she was walking away all I could say was, “Hi.”  Yes, lame I know, but she said, “Hi,” back to us all.  After she walked around the corner I freaked out a bit (hahaha), sent texts to a few people and then Ashlee took a picture of us in front of her car.  

Another fifteen minutes or so later we were let into the Viper Room.  It was kind of awkward being the first ones there, but the waitress came soon and brought us drinks while we waiting another thirty minutes for the first band to play.  The first band was good; we spent a good amount of the time they were on laughing at the girls that were trying to dance to the music.  I know I shouldn’t make fun because I probably just as stupid once Barcelona came on.

Barcelona’s set was next and we were all so excited.  It was so good to see familiar faces and the thought of listening to them play put a smile on my face that did not come off the rest of the night.  Barcelona was amazing, I would even go as far to say that they kicked ass (excuse my language).  I don’t even know how to put in words how great it was to hear them play or what a wonderful job they did.  By then the place was packed, everyone was moving to the music and those who knew the words were singing along.  From Lesser ThingFirst Floor People to Colors to It’s About Time to One, I was in heaven the whole time they were on.  Well, and after too.  

We hung around inside for about ten minutes after they finished playing, giving them time to get all their stuff outside.  Then we make our way out into the ‘refreshing’ LA air.  We hang back for a while waiting for the masses to disperse from the rock stars; we finally make our way over to the guys for sweaty hugs and hellos.  Then we find a storefront ledge to perch on and rest our feet while the guys load up.  

Little did we know we would shortly be making a new friend. Hahaha.  To make a longer story short, we met a guy named Brian randomly who totally cracked us up.  He told funny stories about his great grandfather who was in a circus, his ballerina ex-friend and even told us that his jacket was a woman’s jacket.  Ashlee then proceeded to tell him about the boob darts of his jacket.  We were all cracking up.  Then, to make the evening even crazier, we ran into two other SPU alumni.  Ashlee exchanged numbers with Clark and I talked with Kate who actually grew up in Idaho too.  

Next it was small talk with Rhett, who shared with us their adventure of being banned from Canada, then with Chris, who told us about his crazy schedule.  From there the girls went back to the Viper Room with Rhett and I went to the Cigar shop we were outside of with Chris.  He told me crazy stories of their adventures touring.  Wow.  

Then the some of the girls dragged me back in for my drink and dancing with the guys.  So funny.  The last band was playing and we were sending out our vibe, dancing like there was no tomorrow.  After the band finished we made our way to the center of the room to cure our dancing fever.  Chris had disappeared somewhere, but Ashlee, Jenny, Jessie, Rhett, Brian and I were having blast.  

By this time it was probably after one in the morning.  As much as we didn’t want to go I knew I would be a tired girl in the morning.  I whispered/yelled to Brian and Rhett that we would love to get a picture with them outside and say our goodbyes because we had to get going.  Back outside we found some random person to take our picture.  Unfortunately, some random girl that knew the guys decided she wanted to be in our picture too.  Weird, right?  

After some long hugs and goodbyes, Jessie, Ashlee, Jenny and I took off down the street, still dancing and sending out our vibe.  As we drove out of Hollywood, with the windows down and the music blaring, we were all content with our wonderful Hollywood adventure.  Despite the fact we did not get home until around 2:30 a.m. it was still, like a rocket on Monday.  J

Friday, July 18, 2008

excerpts from Paris Hangover

I realize maybe I'm just happy I have been a part of his life, able to be inspired and forever connected to this fascinating creature. It's true, I miss being in awe of the man I'm with, amazed at his constant thirst for knowledge, excellence, creativity. But I think I can accept that happens unbelievably rarely in life and I am forever changed for knowing him. And that might be enough.

A quote from Marcel Proust: "We are not provided with wisdom, we must discover it for ourselves, after a journey through the wilderness, which no one can take for us, an effort which no one can spare us, for our wisdom is the point of view from which we come at last to regard the world."

Everything is slowed down here. This relaxed, lacksadaisical approach to life just takes everything down a notch on the stress meter. It's not so important what you do, especially what you do for a living. It's just important that you be. Be in the moment, be who you are, be consistent in your rituals and habits instead of always chasing the trendy and new.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

nicest thing

All I know is that you're so nice,
You're the nicest thing I've seen.
I wish that we could give it a go,
See if we could be something.

I wish I was your favorite girl,
I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world.
I wish my smile was your favorite kind of smile,
I wish the way that I dressed was your favorite kind of style.

I wish you couldn't figure me out,
But you always wanna know what I was about.
I wish you'd hold my hand when I was upset,
I wish you'd never forget the look on my face when we first met.

I wish you had a favorite beauty spot that you loved secretly,
'Cos it was on a hidden bit that nobody else could see.
Basically, I wish that you loved me,
I wish that you needed me,
I wish that you knew when I said two sugars, actually I meant three.

I wish that without me your heart would break,
I wish that without me you'd be spending the rest of your nights awake.
I wish that without me you couldn't eat,
I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep.

All I know is that you're the nicest thing I've ever seen;
I wish that we could see if we could be something

Kate Nash

Monday, July 7, 2008


maybe it's only those who've made such chaos of their lives who can understand the heights and depths of God's mercy

excerpt from Other People's Love Letters

Something happened in the last 8 months. You became my closest friend, but I also developed strong feelings for you. Now you’re gone, yet I still see you and think of you everywhere. I have to readjust to life without someone on whom I had relied pretty strongly for emotional support. It’s shaping up to be quite a feat, seeing as your presence had helped me adjust to life here in the first place. Whenever something was bothering me throughout the course of the day, I was always satisfied with knowing that I’d go home and see you and I’d feel better. That notion always helped me get through the day. This is probably coming as a shock to you, but just bear with me.

I had really started to get past this once you left in July. The first week was definitely a struggle. But then I went to Boston and was doing fun things, so my mind started to be occupied. And by the time you came back from S. America and I spoke with you on the phone, I felt like I had gotten over you and you were just my very good friend, nothing more. And then I saw you again. And everything that was there came rushing back.

As Sara said last night, not only is it difficult for me to handle change, I especially have difficulty going from “more to less”: I had this very-close-to-ideal living situation, and now I suddenly don’t. In addition to that, it’s sometimes hard for me to see the forest for the trees—I have much to focus on right now, and I now have the perfect opportunity to care for and tend to myself and my responsibilities and the things I want to do since I no longer have someone around whose well-being I sometimes considered before my own. But all I can see right now is the absence of you.

I also have trouble with the notion that I need to get over this. That just kills me. I don’t understand why I should have to get over you. I keep telling myself that I have to and forcing myself to make it happen, but that just doesn’t seem fair to me. I’ve spent the past few years of “growing up” realizing that I have to be much more guarded when it comes to men. I too easily allow myself to become emotionally open to men and start to care about them, some more than they have deserve. So I’ve really come to be much more selective. And here I found someone who is completely deserving of everything I have to offer, and we still can’t be together. And I know that. Definitely not now, probably not in the future either. But how is that right? What learning am I to take away from this? Yes, I have a wonderful friend whom I look up to and from whom I have already learned so much. But I still don’t know how to guard myself against this happening in the future. How can I start to emotionally guard myself from someone who seems so perfect for me?

I really do understand that nothing can be done with this on your part, and I don’t really expect you to make it better or to respond in any certain way. It’s probably almost better if you didn’t. I just had to get it out. Please know that I certainly don’t feel in any way hurt by you—you clearly have never hurt me. And I suspect that after reading this, you’re probably inclined to want to fix it or make it better, which is a perfect example of what it is about you that I love so much. But I know it can’t be fixed. It’s just something with which I have to deal.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

she & him

It has been one month since I began my internship.  It is really unbelievable.  To a point I still feel like I do not know what I am doing, but I know that it is going to take time to figure out what my role here looks like.  I can see how I could easily slide by this year and really do/accomplish nothing, but I do not want that to happen.  I am really in a fantastic place; a place of opportunity.  I could really try anything at all.  The church is open to growth and trying new things.  Right now I am still trying to get to know everyone's names and faces, but I have great ideas for fellowship events to build community within the church and invite those in the surrounding communities into the church.  Although my focus at this point is Vacation Bible School; I am the director.  I will get to wear a silly, bright orange shirt, a huge vest and a green bandana.  :)

Something that I am having difficulty with is transitioning from an atmosphere of strict routine, with classes, events and my other responsibilities scheduled for me, to an atmosphere where I am supposed to set my own hours and work completely on my own terms.  I am learning what discipline, motivation and accountability truly are.  I have appreciated the understanding from Pastor and the congregation, that it is taking me time to work all those things out.  They really have let me ease into my position here.  I am so grateful for that.

During this amazingly big transition of my life I have experienced "the peace of God, which transcends all understanding."  Really.  True, beautiful, unexplainable peace.  I am pushing worry, with full force, out of my life.  There are so many unknowns in my life that have been driving me crazy, but I began to reflect on my life up to this point.  I can clearly see God's work in my life, His provisions, blessings and abundant love.  Wow.  Really, what do I have to worry about?  I have no doubt that God will work those unknowns out and bless me more than I can imagine.

"And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how WIDE and LONG and HIGH and DEEP is the love of Christ, and to know this LOVE THAT SURPASSES KNOWLEDGE- that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.  Now to him who is able to do IMMEASURABLY MORE than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen."  Ephesians 3:17b-21

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."  Proverbs 3:5-6